Codependency

Codependency, often referred to as relationship addiction, is a term that can feel both misleading and difficult to fully grasp. At its core, codependency is a learned emotional and behavioral condition that affects an individual’s ability to engage in healthy, balanced, and mutually satisfying relationships. It often leads to patterns of self-sacrifice, people-pleasing, and dependency on others for self-worth or emotional stability.

Understanding Codependency

Those who struggle with codependency often find themselves in one-sided relationships—whether with family members, intimate partners, or friends—that may be emotionally destructive or even abusive. These relationships are marked by an imbalance where the codependent person puts forth significant effort to "help" or "fix" others, often to their own detriment.

Common characteristics of codependency include:

• Low Self-Esteem: Feelings of inadequacy or seeking validation from others to feel worthwhile.
• People-Pleasing: Prioritizing others’ needs over one’s own, even at the expense of personal well-being.
• Difficulty Setting Boundaries: Saying “no” or maintaining personal boundaries feels uncomfortable or impossible.
• Caretaking Behaviors: Taking responsibility for others’ emotions, problems, or behaviors, often neglecting oneself in the process.
• Fear of Abandonment: Staying in unhealthy relationships out of a deep fear of being alone or rejected.

Over time, these patterns can lead to feelings of exhaustion, frustration, and emotional emptiness, as the effort to "fix" others often results in little to no change. This creates a cycle of compulsive, defeating behaviors that reinforce feelings of inadequacy and dependency.

How Therapy Helps with Codependency

Breaking free from the cycle of codependency requires a deeper understanding of its origins and a commitment to self-growth. Therapy provides a safe, non-judgmental space to explore these patterns and build healthier ways of relating to yourself and others.

• Unpacking the Roots: Codependency is often tied to early life experiences, such as growing up in a family system with addiction, neglect, or emotional instability. Therapy can help you uncover these roots and understand how they’ve shaped your current behaviors.
• Building Self-Esteem: A therapist can guide you in developing a stronger sense of self-worth, independent of external validation, and help you rediscover your personal strengths.
• Learning to Set Boundaries: Healthy relationships thrive on clear and respectful boundaries. Therapy can help you identify your needs, communicate them effectively, and establish limits that protect your well-being.
• Healing the Nervous System: Codependency often results in chronic stress and nervous system dysregulation. Integrating somatic practices into therapy can help you reconnect with your body and create a sense of safety and calm.
• Creating Balanced Relationships: Therapy focuses on fostering mutually satisfying relationships built on trust, respect, and reciprocity.

Moving Toward Healthier Connections

Recovering from codependency is not about rejecting relationships—it’s about transforming the way you connect with others and, most importantly, with yourself. Therapy empowers you to break free from old patterns, prioritize your needs, and cultivate relationships that are fulfilling and healthy.

At Level Up Mental Health Collaborative, we specialize in helping individuals identify and overcome codependent behaviors through compassionate, holistic care.

If you’re struggling with the dynamics of codependecy and need support, contact us to schedule an appointment.